Slugs and Thugs (Part II)

Posted on Mon Feb 26th, 2024 @ 1:27am by Warrant Officer Valko Kostova & Lieutenant Skye MacLeod & Lieutenant JG Tilo Riehl

1,787 words; about a 9 minute read

Mission: Ninety-Nine Bottles of Swill
Location: Clarus

With their little Ferengi problem taken care of at least for the time being, Lieutenant MacLeod, Tilo Riehl, and Valko Kostova proceeded around the cliffs and grassy knolls of Clarus until they arrived in a valley, landscape that eventually took the trio to marsh lands. There were patches of green among the mucky murky water as far as the eyes could see.

A large industrial complex sat near by on what could best be described as a small island out yonder, but a closer inspection would change that perception. Islands usually conjured idea vacation spots. This was not. As they trekked through the murky water their lacks became soaked from the thigh down, others a bit higher given height differences. Each undoubtedly feeling the squishy and relentless bottom of the marsh which felt like a seabeast with large suction cup tentacles latching onto their boots and ankles.

Valko consulted the science officer, but his eyes told him they had arrived. The plants around them sticking out from the water. The agricultural planet of Balancar was the Ferengi's largest source of Squill plants, but Clarus had its own share and was the industrial planet where processing took take.

"I think we've found the Squill plants if this marsh is any indication" stated Valko. He gestured at the island ahead. "That looks like a factory building" added the pilot. The things I do for Starfleet he thought to himself.

Muttering profanities under his breath, Riehl pulled forward on the straps of his field pack and tightened them. Given his short stature, the pack was higher up on his back than was comfortable.

Seeing the pilot slow and gesture ahead, he grunted in acknowledgement, and asked sourly, 'any sign of dry land near it?'

"Da, somewhere over the rainbow of latinum," quipped Valko. "We're on an industrial planet with agricultural processing for the Ferengi Alliance. It's muddy, it's wet, and I don't think dry is in the Ferengi vocabulary" added the pilot. He sighed.

"I also think we've discovered the cause of the contamination," Skye said, pausing to pull her boot out of a particularly sticky bit of mud. "They probably get their water from the marsh and don't use proper filtration." She paused again to take a small sample vial out of her bag and collect some of the marsh water for later analysis. She just hoped they'd get to the doctor for treatment from whatever was in the water before it made them sick.

Glancing down at the foul water, then back up at the science officer, Riehl asked, 'anything we can do from here? Drop a few purification tablets into the marsh?'

Valko scoffed. "I don't think we have enough of those to make an impact."

"As long as we're up to date on our shots, and get a good detox from medical, we should be fine," Skye added.

"Perhaps someone has tampered with whatever filtration system they have in place, or it's just shitty Ferengi management" Valko Kostova quipped. "Either way, I think we should head to that facility."

'I'm putting my money on cost-cutting,' Riehl replied with a rueful smile. 'Join Starfleet, the Quadrant's Public Health Department.' He clapped the scientist on the shoulder. 'Let's get going.' Catching Valko's eye he grinned, 'hope you've got the stamina for another boggy trek.'

Skye chuckled.

"So long as we don't get shot at again" Valko replied. "I have no interest dying in this boggy nightmare on a Ferengi planet near a damn Squill factory of all places."

"We're more likely to die of whatever diseases are in the water," Skye assured him. "This is an example of Ferengi mismanagement at its finest."

Valko groaned trudging through the muck of the murky water. "Because knocking on the door asking to speak to the manager goes well historically" he said teasingly.

"Actually, that might be what we need to do. This is becoming a public health problem. We've had suck Ferengi show up at our doorstep" noted Valko. "We could blackmail them. We have the data. You have water samples. The Doctor will have the medical records, and if we leak this to the public...Ferengi love their fortunes, and despise lawsuits."

"I wouldn't put it past them to blame it on someone else--or simply destroy the facility and start up elsewhere." She slapped some form of mosquito that landed on her arm. "At least some of the evidence won't disappear if we do." It was dark humor, but right now it suited her mood--and this dratted swamp.

Valko grumbled "I have absolutely no plan on disappearing," he said. They trudged through and neared the facility where Valko spotted a Ferengi lurking around dressed in what could est be described as garish attire. "Who runs this facility?!"

The Ferengi sneared. "Hu-mons," the Ferengi said. "Ifyou've come to make an offer on my business, it's going to cost you a lobe's worth."

Valko glared at the Ferengi. "If you are trying to sell your facility, it better not be at market value. It needs to be given away. The health violations out there..." he looked over at Skye.

The scientist pulled out a piece of paper she'd used to write down a formula she later transferred to her computer, but the paper still resided in her away bag and began to read off a list of hazardous chemicals found in both the water and the cola. She may have exaggerated a little, but it was for a good cause. Besides, she was ticked. "That does not account for the 234 cases of bubonic plague we discovered after a coming-of-age party on Cenari Four. There are currently five hundred lawsuits against this company from that one colony. There are cases of leprosy, spotted dick, and cranial warts. Starfleet has a team of one hundred paralegals working around the clock just to process all the others. By the time they're finished with you, this planet won't be worth a bowl of gagh."

"It was my idiot brother!" exclaimed the Ferengi. "We inherited the business from our father, but my idiot brother has been cutting corners in an unprofitable way. I am up to my lobes in lawsuits." He shook his head. "Please, I'll close the factory down. I just need help repairing the damaged equipment and better filtration systems."

"That won't help with the lawsuits. Besides, it would be unprofitable for Starfleet to get involved in such a venture." Skye looked at the other two. "I'm surprised the Grand Nagus hasn't shut you down already. If we were to help as you asked, you'd be back in production before we left the system and then we'd be culpable for your perfidy."

"The financial ruin," the Ferengi groaned. "Hu-mons. Meddling hu-mons" he added and shook his head. "You are going to bring this to the attention of the Nagus, he'll have my lobes for this."

Skye sighed. The Ferengi had already ruined whatever business he had. "Do you honestly think he isn't aware of this already? People are getting sick and dying across two quadrants. You either have to clean up your business immediately or shut down."

Like clockwork, the doors opened and with a stern looking Ferengi male flanked by two hulking Hupyrians on either side. "Gonk, Ferengi Health Commission" he said. He looked prestine, but the two Hupyrians had clearly walked through everything.

Valko wondered if the Ferengi was carried by his escorts, or guards. Whatever they were. "This place is a disaster. I'm shutting you down and saving the Grand Nagus from the embarrassment. Do you know how many customers you have made sick?"

Gonk looked at the three non-Ferengi. "Starfleet Hu-mons. What business does the Federation have here?"

"You sell to Federation worlds. If you refuse to shut down until your product is safe, you will be banned from selling or transporting your products through Federation space." And Skye was going to make sure the Grand Nagus knew they'd given this bobble-headed Ferengi plenty of opportunities to save face and continue making a profit. She was done with his bluster. She was tired, she'd been shot at, eaten alive by bugs, and would likely have to go into quarantine until medical could identify the petri dish of toxic chemicals they'd just sloshed through. She wasn't in a mood to be charitable.

"This place will be closed indefinitely," Gronk said. "Send your findings to the Ferengi Health Commission. We will transmit compensation."

"You know what this place needs?" Skye asked, not caring if the Ferengi listened or not. "About a ton of bleach. I think I can put in an order for next week and have it dumped in your swamp. You won't have to worry about toxins in your cola." She pulled out her tricorder and set it up to record and to do a chemical evaluation of the swamp. "Smile," she told the Ferengi and began to scan the swamp, the building, and Gronk. She checked the scan and frowned at the list of toxins. Then she copied it to her PADD and to the shuttle. From her PADD she sent it to anywhere she could. "I have no doubt that'll help you close down. I'm sure whatever health commission you have will hear from us by tomorrow. Have a nice day."

She turned to the other two. "Sorry, but I'm done here. I'm pretty sure he'll be back in business the moment we leave the planet. That was just a little incentive to make him do as he said." She wasn't sure if anyone but the local Ferengi would see her data transmission, but if not, she'd be sure to send it to every scientific community she could once they reached Federation space. This place needed to be shut down and the Ferengi would never give up something that made a profit.

Valko nodded. "No, I agree. I think we have done more than enough here. We should get back to the shuttle and return to Bellwether Station, Brott will want to know about this."

'Suits me just fine,' Riehl replied miserably. The swamp was caked to his uniform, it stank, and the Ferengi wanted nothing to do with their assistance. 'There's not much point if they're going to keep producing.'

Valko walked towards the doorway and gestured towards Skye. "Ladies first" he said with a smirk. He was ready to get in the shuttle, back to Bellwether, pack up his belongings and clear out. He was just ready to move on to something else that didn't involve Ferengi.

_________________________

Lieutenant Skye MacLeod
Science Officer

Lieutenant JG Tilo Riehl
Security Chief

Warrant Officer Valko Kostova
Shuttle Pilot

 

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